Dentist = Delightful

As all seven of you may know, my wife recently posted her blog about her experience at the dentist. The unfortunate part about the blog is that she spent the whole time discussing how dreadful the dentist is. Well, I beg to differ. Some of us actually like going to the dentist. For example... me. I like to see the dentist as a good movie. There are plenty of exciting things that happen at the dentist.  Today was my dentist appointment. I was scheduled to get two wisdom teeth pulled.

No. No. Please don't wince and grimace. It was a delightful time.

When I first stepped into the operating room, I must admit I was a little nervous. The nurse lead me to a chair that had about ten long Velcro straps. While  being strapped in, I noticed a full  I.V. bag which the nurse called "the juice" hanging from the ceiling.  Strapped in, my pulse began to race a little when I saw the doctor walk in with a needle as long as my arm.

"You're not one those guys that cries at the sight of a needle are you?"

I lied, "Nope"

Expecting them to jam this needle into my arm, I was surprised when the nurse took the tenth strap and strapped my head to the headrest. In my head I panicked thinking, 'This is lethal injection!'

Then the nurse's gentle voice said, "This is just a little laughing gas. Continue to breath normally."

That's when the movie started. I know, perfect timing right?  The nurse placed the nozzle over my nose as the doctor began rubbing alcohol on my arm.  I felt a slight sting in my arm and the doctor said, "Congrats, you broke my 100th-try streak of finding a vein on the first try."

This movie was great! Not only was the movie hilarious.. I win stuff too!  I laughed out loud smiling at the doctor as he walked over to my other arm with a separate needle.  He turned and looked me in the eyes screaming kind of loud like I was deaf or something. I think there was something wrong with the sound of the movie because he was talking in this slow, really deep voice.
" Aarrreee yoouu stilllll wittthhh uusss?" But I couldn't respond, the evil nurse was standing right behind him with an even bigger needle in her hand. I thought  for sure she was going to stab him with it, but then the screen went blurry.

Note to readers: If you go to a dentist with a movie theater like mine, ask if their projector works.

For the next hour or so I spent the rest of the time wondering how the doctor's  eyes had so many veins. I wondered if one vein got into a fight with another vein because they crowded each other's space.

Apparently, the doctor thought I was a little into the vein fight scene, because I could vaguely hear him in the background saying, "Keep your mouth open, pal. We're almost done. Julie, keep his head still." I was mad that the doctor ruined the movie. What can I say? When I watch fighting movies, I really get into them and pretend to be Jackie Chan. Sorry Julie.

The procedure was over and I was sitting in my chair furious that I didn't get to see the end of the movie. Then my wife walked in. "Haha, You look funny" (read: Honey you are to the most handsome man I've ever seen. )

My response, "How would  like it if someone called YOU ugly?!" (read: Babe, you are extremely beautiful.)

The nurse probably noticed my shocked reaction to her as she helped me out of operating chair to the wheelchair. I couldn't believe she was strong enough to carry me with no struggle or strain. I thought about moving my feet, but what was the point? I enjoyed the ride.

As Julie wheeled me to the car, I noticed the doctor gave my wife my bag of prizes for going to the dentist.
I was really hoping it was a toothbrush or a sticker with a smiling tooth on it. Barely able to contain my excitement, I called to my wife: "Are those my teeth?"

Apparently, the dentist doesn't let adults cash in their teeth to the tooth fairy. Instead, he cashes them in and charges you 200 bucks for it. I think it's for shipping and handling... to  make sure the tooth fairy gets it.

The good news is he gave me two bottles of this "candy for adults".  I took some before I started typing this blog. This things are great!

I love the deenttlopippiupioupppp